The Power of Letting Go: A New Chapter Without Our Bus | Day 276 of my 2023 Journal

Clearing out spaces sets us free(er)

We spent the morning enjoying the beautiful sunrise, left the van to allow for Jesper's calls, and had coffee at the local cafe, discussing travel plans and education plans and how they can mix - before going for the healing spring and a morning run.

The run was amazing, though I do prefer lower temperatures and especially lower humidity.

At midday, it was time to return to the bus to finish the job. It seems we have a buyer, and it feels right to let go of the 11-ton vehicle, the stuff we had in it, and the life we lived at La Bassa.

It is, of course, overwhelming too. Almost to the day, it is five years since we drove the bus out of Denmark in search of a life of adventure, freedom, art, nature, people, languages, and cultures. For five years, it has been our base, an anchor, a sanctuary when people died (my parents) or the world went crazy(er) (the lockdowns). At one point, we worked towards buying a piece of land to have a more “real and permanent” home in Catalonia.

But the universe is amazing. It works in mysterious but clear ways. Though it should be cheap and easy, it never worked out to buy the land, and so we let go of that idea. Just like the first year, when something strange or devastating or just annoying happened every time we tried to move the bus. As if something huge was calling us, letting us know: The bus was going nowhere.

It has never been a problem for us to leave and come back, and in the past years, we have come back less and less until now, when we realize we can come back without the anchor.

It is strange how things that are very RIGHT often feel confronting, almost painful, always powerful, how pushing through and coping with the strong and complex emotions is the only way really moving things forward, the clear sign it is all flying high.

At the end of the day, we were done with the bus, empty and clean, and had begun the same clearing process of the van. The van we are keeping, though. Just not all the stuff inside it.

With love

Cecilie Conrad

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